Vodka Tractors Rock n Roll

I went to see the Leningrad Cowboys on Saturday night. The concert was in a shopping centre in the middle of nowhere (or Lempäälä as it is sometimes called). The Leningrad cowboys themselves are pretty interesting and were being backed by the Red Army Choir. It was interesting to be watching a band standing next to a branch of H&M. The band themselves were pretty good. At least as good as a band doing covers of Sweet Home Alabama and Those Were the Days can be. With very large quiffs.



We queued up in the wrong bus queue afterwards which wouldn't have been so bad except that it was -5 or so, and felt worse because of the wind. It could have been worse too since tonight there is a pretty major snow storm blasting through Tampere. It took me a few beers afterwards to get the blood flowing to some of the areas more affected by the cold - my whole body essentially.

Anyway, the Leningrad Cowboys were from a 1989 film called Leningrad Cowboys Go America. And very good it is too. The follow up film, Leningrad Cowboys Meet Moses, is pretty good too. You should watch them sometime. I think that there are only a few of the original members left now but they are pretty good fun. It says something about Finland that one of the most popular bands here is a made up band with incredibly long quiffs and shoes singing covers of karaoke standards. I'm just not all that sure what it says exactly. All the same, here's a bit from the film.

Now pay attention, 007...

For as long as I can remember, I've always been a Bond fan. It's one of my guilty pleasures - one that has come round full circle now that Bond is considered cool again. So who is the best Bond? The majority would side with Connery, but the question's a no-brainer: the best Bond is the Bond you grew up with. I was born the year between The Spy Who Loved Me and Moonraker, so for me Roger Moore is Bond.

Somewhere in the dark recesses of my mind, there's a list of people I have resigned myself to never having the opportunity to meet. These are childhood heroes - mainly from the silver screen - who operate in a different world to my humdrum existence. On this list, quite near the top - if not number one completely - is Roger Moore. Or, Sir Roger Moore, to you. So it was with excitement that this weekend I had the opportunity to meet the great man and get his autograph in a copy of his new book:























After getting rushed through having my book signed, I decided to hang around and soak in the atmosphere. I reckon I could have taken him with a judo chop to the back of the neck here:


















Finally, after his allotted hour was over, I positioned myself in his route out of the store and managed to get a quick handshake:




(A big thankyou goes out to my own Moneypenny for capturing this moment).

Bank Crisis

There isn't a lot to add to this clip. It made me chuckle. There isn't much English TV that I watch here, but I watch Stephen Colbert every now and then on the internet and it is always funny.



It's almost as funny as the Happening, which I watched this week and found pretty hilarious. Apparently plants can talk to each other - it's been proven. And they can control their evolution. I won't say too much about it since Johnny said it so much better than I ever could already on here. All I say is to echo Mark Kermode and ask, what is making the wind blow?

Anyway, its Red Nose Day here in Finland so I'll get back to watching the Naked Clown.

Matthew Gibson: Still providing laughter from the other side of Europe

I am always pleased to hear that I am funny. Occasionally it is because of some pithy remark of mine. Unfortunately it seems that there are significantly many other occasions when people decide that I am funny because of my appearance. That's fair enough in a way - laugh at a man because of the clothes he choses to wear.

I think that it's a bit low on the other hand to be wiping tears of joy from your eyes laughing at 20 year old photos and videos. It's even more vicious to show said photos and videos to people being introduced to the family who know that particular person and will find them hilarious and attempt to distribute them among his other friends. And when that man (the one in the photos - keep up) isn't even living in the country and is unable to defend himself, well that's a disgrace.

And while I would do exactly the same thing if I got hold of any photos of Ben as a child, that's not the point - I don't have any so it is not fair to show him pictures of me. It is a completely different situation and if the photos were of anybody else it would be fine. But they're not, they're pictures of me, and as such it's just cruel.

I think that it's time that I redress the balance and so include here a photo of me at a fancy meal in my finery looking great among the type of surroundings to which I belong.



Incedentally, although the cake was excellent (and thanks even 20 years later to Lynn for making it) it did turn my shit green for a week. In my mind, that's what you eat cake for. What good cake doesn't turn your insides green?
And no, I wasn't drinking that Martini you can see on the table - my whisky was out of sight for this photo.

While 1000 birds circle overhead in the brooding red sky...

I'm getting back moving tonight. I will be playing Badminton tonight at Tampere Arena. I think that sounds quite extreme - like I would be playing in front of 15000 people. This actually happened to a guy I used to know, or so he claims. He was struggling to find a badminton court and found out that Manchester Veledrome sets up a few courts while there aren't any cycle races on. He turned up to discover that there were both badminton courts and cycle races. Unperterbed, they started playing. Unfortunately not a lot was happening was in the races and the crowd's attention was drawn to the action on the badminton courts. They chose their favourites and started cheering the results. The players were especially happy to get a round of applause after a particularly long ralley. Of course, he told me all this about ten years ago and I got the feeling then that he was stretching the story a little bit and I think that some of the details have been fixed wrongly in my head. I think that it's a nice story though. All the same, I expect that anybody watching me play my first badminton game in nearly 10 years will be sorely disapointed at the skills on display.

But winter is coming and I need to get moving before the extreme cold comes. Currently it's about +5 but Ulriikka doesn't think that it's winter coat cold. She thinks it's even too early to wear my fancy new wooly winter boots. I mean for me to wear my furry winter boots. Not her.

Incidentally, has anybody heard the results of the US presidential elections? The world media seems strangely quiet on the outcome. I assume that Mike Huckabee won.